So there were a few things that didn’t feel right about the draft of Flight of Passion.  Isamura just had too many answers at the briefing, and I don’t think she should know everything.  So now instead she knows someone who deals in the kind of crystal that they need.  But there are no particular guarantees, except of course that six weeks is too long to just sit around and wait.

I also fixed the part where Caroline is nervous and her palms are sweaty during the flight.  Instead of it being excitement, I attributed it to the weirdness of the neural interface, which allows the pilot to fly the shuttle by thinking about it.  I mean, it’s all very well having a navigation computer which tells you how to get there, it’s another thing entirely for it to read your mind and just go there without needing to be prompted.

As usual, the new draft is here if you want to take a peek and see exactly what changes I’ve made.  Hopefully they’re for the better.